If you’re planning on drinking beer all summer long, then you, sir, are a gentleman. If you’re planning on drinking Berliner Weisse all summer long, then you are a gentleman AND a scholar. If you’ve done your craft beer research lately, and I know you haven’t because the craft beer research paper I assigned you is way overdue and I’ve already given you an F and a sad face sticker that has a scratch-and-sniff scent of hobbit feet (which isn’t to be thought of as a reward), you would know that Berliner Weisse is one the best summerdranks of all time.
Berliner Weisse beers are wheat beers that are light and refreshing. What’s more, they’re pleasantly tart, slightly lemony, and sessionable. Seriously, you can drink five or six of them over the course of an entire family reunion and probably not spill potato salad all over your baby nephew. Probably. Maybe. I dunno, but they are low in alcohol, so drink up!
It’s difficult to explain how great this beer style is for the summer. Let’s just say, if I could Weird-Science a perfect summer wheat beer, it’d totally be a Berliner Weisse. More specifically, it’d be a Berliner Weisse that looks super hot in a swimsuit and takes me to Whataburger once a week.
But since most of us aren’t BFFs or even Facebook friends with John Hughes, said Weird Science scenario is impossible. Instead, please consider getting your Berliner Weisse fix from one of these fine Texas breweries:
- This seasonal brew can be found in cans in the Austin area, but it goes quickly, so you gotta move fast.
- This local favorite has just been brewed and should be released any week now. Find it at Austin Beerworks’ taproom when the time is right *winkies*
- Ok, granted, this isn’t exactly a Berliner Weisse. Live Oak’s true Berliner Weisse was released in April, and you may have a hard time tracking it down now. However, Lichtenhainer is like a Berliner Weisse, but with a smokey twist to it. You can get this beer on tap at various Austin drinking establishments. Schoolhouse Pub is set to hook up a keg of it in the next few days, so get ready!
- Buy this Boiler beauty in bombers at bottle shops and imbibe with the burliest of b…bears? No, that doesn’t work. Alliteration can be hard, y’all. Get Boiler Room at Spec’s and fancy gas stations, ok?
As for the pairing for these beers, I could tell you that they’re great for floating the river, sitting out by the pool, or grabbing a pint on an outdoor patio, but that’s typical. I’m about PERFECT pairings – pairings that speak to you. And the Berliner Weisse, with its sessionable summer superiority, is so good, it makes me feel like I’m getting away with something very naughty when I drink it…even though I’m not.
So let’s go with that. Let’s pair the above Berliner Weisse of your choice with other “vices”. Vices that you feel are somewhat sinful, but probably aren’t really that bad. Here are some of my favorite vices that I will toast to with my Berliner Weisse:
- Telling my cats (in a happy voice) that they look really stupid today.
- Taking multiple free samples at the grocery store when I know I’m not going to make the recipe.
- Insulting people from my car…in my head…and sometimes they’re actually compliments…so there.
- Wearing a fanny pack that would make Vanilla Ice sad.
- Bathtub toots.
- Other types of fartings.
Ok, that should be enough to get you going. What are your vices? Confess in the comments section below, and I’ll reply in an effort to shame you further.
Enjoy your weisses and your vices, may God have mercy on your soul, and I’ll see you next time!